In a paper published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine, researchers at Utrecht University reported that a gene that controls the hormone serotonin may be to blame for premature ejaculation. Whaaaaat!? “Why is this on a gaming web site” you ask? Well, Paula Hall, a sexual psychotherapist, had this to say, “These men have very quick reflexes. They may be excellent at playing tennis or computer games, for example.” Damn, so I guess that means if you’re good at Top Spin you probably won’t even get it out of your pants.
Alright, gamers, go out and prove them wrong. In the mean time, this is just new fodder for when you do get pwnd online. Next time someone is bragging at the top of the scoreboard in an online match, just tell them what that means about him. I know that from now on when I play with friends online, the #1 ranked guy in the post game chat room will now be the “Supreme Premature Ejaculator,” unless, of course it’s me, in which case, I just got lucky.
POST NOTE TO GAME DEVELOPERS: First one of you to make a “Premajaculator” achievement for winning an online match is the coolest.
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7 Comments
Write a Comment»What a curveball! You seemed like this wholesome dude and then you write this interesting piece of work.
If you want my two cents I think I have extremely good reflexes and it does make it all of the way out of my pants. Maybe I am just an exception to the rule?
Nice find though, touche.
Jeff,
Good writing. I usually do rank amongst the highest in COD4 multiplayer… In my defense, how much time does “premature ejaculation” cover? Or maybe I should ask my girlfriend. I shall lose on purpose from now on, dammit!
I’m not about to make a video for you guys but I can tell you that it takes awhile. Then again I’m not an extreme gamer either.
Maybe too much info?
Now #1 ranked aren’t on top of the world no more. You premature ejaculators!! Jk. Haha, nice find.
In my opinion, I would have to agree with this article.
Those reflexes can serve other duties, though =)
@ EHT - Agreed! Everytime I come in last I am gonna have to start yelling in the game lobbies, ok who squirted LOL.
If this is the case, does that mean the kid who got 100% on Through the Fire and Flames on Expert couldn’t last more than 2 seconds. They should rename that achievement to “Two Pump Chump”