We here at Loot Ninja play our games hard! We ride our victims into the ground, we demoralize them with ball gags, rope and other various items. We humiliate them and teach them who’s their daddy, then move on to the next unsuspecting victim. After a hard day of killin’ we like to sit back in our chairs, un-tie the top of our sweatpants, and let some fresh air in. Killin’ is hard work, but we also like the softer side of our gaming consoles. You know what I’m talking about right? The soft glow of that magical power button, or the look of that black slit with loads of fun just on the other side? You getting warmed up or excited yet? Well good! Because now I want you to think about a 90 year old tran-sexual named “Candy” with irritable bowel syndrome going to the bathroom. That should have fixed that excited feeling. If not, you might need to get checked out.
Japanese gamers will get a leg up (pun intended) and will be able to enjoy both sides of their console now with their PS3 being able to download and stream HD quality 1080p porn. An organization called Digital Media Mart is using Blu-Ray technology to stream movies, TV shows and anime to our Sony consoles across the Western pond. The ability to do so comes from a DMM.TV labeled disc (which is similar to those found in set top boxes) which contains an application for the PS3 to browse, download, and stream the online DMM archive. Currently the service only works on Japanese PS3’s, but DMM is looking to bring the service to all hard-disk equipped Blu-ray players.
Why is it that Japanese gamers get all of the cool stuff? Why do we live in such an uptight America where I have to put shoes on to go to the XXX store? Why can’t I get my porn on my gaming console? I really need to catch up on my Big Sausage Pizza seasons! Come ON!
What could be more innocent and wholesome than a daughter playing a card game with her father? Furthermore, what could be more innocent when they take the game online and try to play against other normal people? Apparently, a scumbag decided to use his Xbox Vision Camera and show the father and daughter, who also had a camera pointing at them, the porn he was watching. Classy, right? Especially when he saw that the girl was sitting with her father. Maybe Xbox Live Police Dept. can use their time to expel these people as opposed to those who have the word “gay” in their gamertags.
Some people like to look at porno on the computer. Yeah, startling. Well, a Japanese company lets to take that to a whole new level. You can plug this “cock dock” into your laptop via USB and it will go to town on you along with what is happening on screen. Just in case you wanted to do some holiday shopping.
Tera Patrick, better known as an adult film “actress” has joined up with the Saints Row 2 Dev Team. No one knows the exact reason, but we can safely bet that its to add to the game’s marketability. I heard somewhere that gamers like porn, not sure how true that is, but I’ll get some answers. She will be at Comic Con in San Diego to look hot and cocktease all the fanboys staring at her and making memory deposits in their spank banks. The GTA IV craze has somewhat diminished, but I can’t see Saints Row 2 even coming close to matching up with Rockstar’s instant masterpiece.
Chances are you never heard of Cooper Lawrence and chances are you will never again. Last week she went on Fox News to promote her new book, The Cult of Perfection: Making Peace With Your Inner Overachiever. She decided to call Mass Effect, the hit space RPG, video game porn. She went on and on to insult the game simply because of a 60 second “sex” scene, where you see the ass of one of the female aliens. Having never played the game herself, she passed judgment. How did the gaming nation respond? Thousands of gamers when to Amazon and gave her book the worst possible ratings and reviews catapulting it into oblivion. After realizing you don’t get into flame wars with gamers, she recanted.
I recognize that I misspoke,” she said. “I really regret saying that, and now that I’ve seen the game and seen the sex scenes it’s kind of a joke. Before the show I had asked somebody about what they had heard, and they had said it’s like pornography,” she added. “But it’s not like pornography. I’ve seen episodes of ‘Lost’ that are more sexually explicit.
So from Loot Ninja, and the rest of gamer nation, Cooper, fuck you lady. Thanks for trying out. Maybe next year, Gilmore.
And there it is. The adult film industry had made the leap to blu-ray. I understand this is not the quantum leap like 8mm to VHS was in Boogie Nights, but now you can take in a nice skin flick on your PS3. Recent reports suggest that the movie Pirates, an adult version of Treasure Island/Pirates of the Caribbean will now be on blu-ray format says Gizmodo. You don’t believe this exists? Here is the Amazon link. I may never leave the house again.
Slashdot today is reporting news from the Adult Entertainment Expo that Porn giant Digital Playground has switched it’s stance from BluRay to HD-DVD. Apparantly, Sony won’t product BluRay disks for any of these companies because they don’t want any porn on BluRay. This is the EXACT same thing that happened in the BetaMax vs. VHS format wars, where Sony refused to put any Porn on BetaMax. As much as some people don’t want to admit it, the porn industry pushes the new format acceptance. If they globally choose HD-DVD, the format wars could be over really quick.
And there it is. The adult film industry had made the leap to blu-ray. I understand this is not the quantum leap like 8mm to VHS was in Boogie Nights, but now you can take in a nice skin flick on your PS3. Recent reports suggest that the movie Pirates, an adult version of Treasure Island/Pirates of the Caribbean will now be on blu-ray format says 
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